Dunstan's tales of American ignorance brought back a few recollections of my time in the States that I hadn't thought about for a while.
When I was on a training course for work in Tampa, Florida, I got chatting to a blond beach bunny and her boyfriend on the beach, and the conversation went a little somethin' like this:
Blond Beach Bunny: Oh, are you from Australia?
Me: That's right.
BBB: So do you, like, ride kangaroos down the street and stuff?
Me: Er, yes, that's right. I rode one to school pretty much every day.
BBB: Wow! So are they, like, hopping down the main road and stuff?
Me: Yeah, you can just jump on. We don't need public transport, we have kangaroos.
BBB: That is sooooo cool!
And later that same week...
Taxi Driver: Where you from?
Me: Australia.
TD: Oh, you speak pretty good English!
Me: Yeah, well, thankyou.
TD: So what's the climate like over there?
Me: Oh, well we're quite close to Antarctica, so it's pretty cold. Lots of snow, ice storms and quite mountainous terrain.
TD: Oh, I see. I heard most people live on the coast, is that right?
Me: The coast? Nah, we all live inland. It's much too dangerous living on the coast. You know, the tidal waves.
TD: (looking confused): Oh...
I didn't even need to warn them about the drop bears. They just fed me material and I went with it.
Here's something scary to think about: if this is a random stranger's general knowledge of Australia, just how much do they actually know about Iraq???
Posted by mattymcg at July 8, 2004 09:12 PM*slaps forehead* christ! i'm almost ashamed to be an american. really. i feel like i must live in the backwater or something! new york is definitely a bit different than middletown america but i wouldn't say it's much better. i recently saw fahrenheit 9/11 and was reminded of the big election snafu of 2000. my fiance (then boyfriend) and i went to thailand over thanksgiving of that year when all the florida/hanging chad stuff was going on and i remember how many people berated us because we were americans.. "what's up with you people?!" was heard a lot and i remember being very embarassed by the whole gore/bush election scandal. just remember that we're not all idiots! i'm sure that if i went to rural australia i would get someone who would tell me that all americans carry guns or something like that which is, of course, not true. ugh, what a year this has been for america. i can only hope that a change of face in the white house come november will make things better.
Posted by: gleek at July 9, 2004 12:59 AMI am American and unlike Gleek very proud of it.
What a stupid generalized statement of overall American intelligence.
What I am embarrased about is that someone claiming to be American agrees with you.
God How Sad.
Another thing I find really interesting about your story and somewhat contradictory is that you were actually taking a training course in the country you claim to be full of ignorant people.
Proud 2 B:
> What a stupid generalized statement of
> overall American intelligence.
Funny that. I didn't actually make any generalized statements. I just relayed some actual incidents that really happened (yes, really!)
> What I am embarrased about is that
> someone claiming to be American agrees
> with you.
> God How Sad.
What, you mean that she might actually acknowledge that there are some ignorant people out there in her own country, and in other countries? Goodness me, being able to be introspective and take a critical look at one's own country certainly is a terrible trait, isn't it? It's probably best just to assume everything is dandy.
> Another thing I find really
> interesting about your story and
> somewhat contradictory is that you
> were actually taking a training course
> in the country you claim to be full of
> ignorant people.
Hmm, I don't remember saying that. I said they were random strangers. Perhaps you could point me to where it was that I said "the country is full of ignorant people". I have plenty of intelligent American friends, and I think they would probably find these anecdotes as amusing as I did.
One thing I do find interesting about your little rant however is that you chose to comment using a bogus email address. What, you don't have the balls to back your statements up with a real name? Or do you just want to cower behind anonymity and a link to some anti-Michael Moore site? Sheesh. Have you even seen the movie? Or do you refuse to, on the basis that you already KNOW what the truth is and don't need to hear any facts before making your mind up?
gleek: Yes, you are spot on. I am sure I would have similar experiences in parts of Oz. I'll make sure I blog about them next time I strike up a conversation in a country town pub! These two incidents just stuck with me because they made me laugh. I didn't know that the leader of the USA blind nationalist's society read my site...
Sorry to hear you had a hard time in Thailand. It is a shame that so many people the world over continue to judge people based on their country's government.
Posted by: mattymcg at July 9, 2004 01:14 PMYou can be proud of your country while admitting its shortcomings at the same time. Actually that's much healthier.
One thing that I definitely know is that although both Australians and Americans speak English - MOST Americans don't get our humour and are certainly more uptight than we are. The previous poster (not you Matt!!) is a prime example.
Posted by: kat at July 9, 2004 01:20 PMBloody hell - since when have amusing anecdotes been known to cite such calamity!?!?!
It's great to be proud of being American - I wish I was, but unfortunately (or otherwise) I'm not. American that is.
P2BA buddy, you really need to chill. Have you never encountered ignorant people in your own country? God knows Australia has more than her fair share of them (hell, I may even be one!) but we could all do with a bit of introspection and of calling the kettle black. If it is. Even if I don't have a black kettle.
Damn. I really need to go home.
Posted by: Kinki at July 9, 2004 05:08 PM:) wow, i had no idea that i started such a comment spam of your website mattymcg. regardless of what P2BA says, i love my country! i don't "claim to be an american", I AM! i'm glad that we have freedom of speech and the right to criticize our leaders. it seems that most americans these days have forgotten what our constitution stands for and would blindly follow our leader like lemmings. we're a very broad and diverse country with hicks and ignorance.. pulitzer prize winners and nobel laureates. we're no different from other countries in this way! i bet you anything that P2BA is the same guy that lambasted my rave review of fahrenheit 9/11. thanks for standing up for me matt and kinki! i appreciate it.
Posted by: gleek at July 10, 2004 02:54 AMP2BA wouldn't notice an ignorant American if he fell over him. Ignorance is bliss they say.
Just to stir up things a bit I can relate this anecdote from my stay in America. At a Greyhound bus station I was asked where I came from. So, as a basic ignorance-level test, or just a bit of banter, I asked the guy to guess. He said "Australia".
"Spot on," was my reply.
"Huh?"
"Dead right."
"Huh?"
"Correct. How did you guess?" thinking it must have been my accent.
"Your flag," he said pointing to the flag on the shoulder of my jacket, "It's Australian, right?"
This is the point where upon I burst into laughter. Then I had to apologise. I was wearing a German army jacket.
Not all Americans are ignorant like that gentleman, but perhaps more of the PROUD ones are.
wow! a loaded post! lots of opinioses! Does anyone remember the reporter from CNNNN (Aussie comedy show that ran for a few months last year) who went to America when the invasion of Iraq was on? he was showing people in the street a map of Australia and telling them it was Iraq. He got some ripper replies! "Gee, I never knew the place was so big! Well, so we oughta invade them then, they're an even bigger threat than I thought!"
Posted by: Nick at July 10, 2004 08:03 PMCheck out this site Matt - I don't have an email for you anymore.
http://www-unix.oit.umass.edu/~thoureau/japanese.html
Posted by: Hammy at July 11, 2004 12:25 AMWow. I thought only nonwhite people got the "you speak good english for a ". I am an Indian living in America and I get that alot. The amazement continues to grow when they learn I haven't lived in America for that long (6 years). I have also received this "compliment": "you look pretty good for an Indian". I also have gotten statements that India ought to be annihilated because all Indians are muslims and muslims are responsible for all evil in this world. Silly really.
Posted by: Sam at July 11, 2004 11:44 AMI would just like to officially thank PB2A for causing this thread to exceed 10 comments, I haven't had such a popular post in months!
Posted by: mattymcg at July 11, 2004 05:00 PMSam the Indian, what are you doing in America mate? They play baseball over there! C'mon, get your ass over the Australia so you can follow your true religion, cricket! I had an indian taxi driver when I was in Chigaco and I couldn't shut the poor guy up once I started chatting about cricket, the poor guy was so deprived!
Posted by: Nick at July 11, 2004 09:51 PMNick the Australian, a trip to Sydney is currently in its initial planning stages. I have a feeling I will like it so much that I may even move there. And nothing like basketball and American football to prove how incredibly dull some sports can be. Cricket is the true religion!
Posted by: Sam at July 12, 2004 11:06 AMmatt, i've been watching this thread grow with great amusement since kat told me about it at friday night drinks in inokashira park. we were both chuckling cause we know that you are the sweetest and most balanced guy in the world and that to be deliberately offensive, small minded or racist was the furtherest thing from your mind.
and then we bemoaned the fact that so many americans just take themselves (and other peoples lives/thoughts/comments/blogs) too seriously. thank god for that hilarious CNN comedy show - i think it's called the morning show? it has me in fits every time, and it gives proof that america can laugh at itself.
yesterday on the show, a reporter was following this guy around who was making an anti-michael moore film, called "micheal moore hates america", she was obviously a supporter of free speech and also a friend of michael moores' (unbenownst to said filmmaker) and was poking fun at the whole ignorant "micheal moore is UNAMERICAN" theme rife in the states these days. i laughed till i cried! it was hilarious.
my fave part of the opinios' comment fury? most definately the conversation between sam the indian and nick the australian.... priceless.
Posted by: frangipani at July 12, 2004 12:14 PMCricket is the true religion, and Sachin Tendulkar is GOD! What a bloody champion batsman he is for India, I'll even say that as an Aussie! That's why any cricket-loving Indian is a friend of mine! And we also play our own brand of football over here too, without the padding and helmet! (Because we're all meatheads!)
Posted by: Nick at July 13, 2004 12:17 AM